Are You Living Your Dreams?

Recently, a dear friend asked me if I was living my dreams. She wanted to know, as a little girl growing up in Milwaukee, did I dream of becoming a mother, wife, stepmother? Did I dream of leaving Milwaukee? Did I dream of being a writer? Did my dreams change over time? Do I think about fulfilling those unfulfilled dreams? And my answers were yes and no. 

As a young girl I wanted to be a secretary … and I wanted to be rich. Lol, what was I thinking? Does secretary and rich even go together? Where some children would play house or doctor, I was using some of my dresser drawers as file cabinets. Ripping out magazine articles (Teen Magazine) and filing them in ABC order so that I could go back to them and read them later. I loved order and organizing even in my early teens. Now that I think about it, I guess as a virtual assistant, I’m living this dream … except for the rich part (so far).

As I got older, I wanted to be an Architectural Engineer. I’ve always excelled in math, drafting, and art classes. Instead of pursuing that dream, I became a sheet metal worker. The money was off the hook (lol) and I could do some of the things I enjoyed (reading blueprints, creating/designing something out of nothing and using tools). Man, those were some good times. Being a sheet metal worker was not necessarily a dream, but some wonderful experiences, and opportunities came out of it. With the amazing men I worked with I learned everything from how to replace a roof on a house, to changing out my car radiator, to the ins-and-outs of investing (especially in real estate). All of that while still in my early 20s.

Not sure if this was my dream, or part of my parent’s dream, but while going through my sheet metal apprenticeship, I also attended college. I come from an entrepreneur family so it was (still is) in my blood to be my own boss. Though I enjoyed construction work – I knew I’d be my own boss someday, so I got my degree in business management.

As for dreaming of marriage– didn’t think much about it until I was in my late 20s, early 30s. Almost ten years ago I married a wonderful man who has brought more joy into my life than I could’ve dreamed. Though being a mom wasn’t on my must do list, I have several wonderful godchildren, and I became a stepmom to two amazing children.

As for dreaming of leaving Milwaukee … well I dreamed more about leaving the snow (lol). So a year after my husband and I married, we moved to one of the most beautiful cities in the country – San Diego. Not only did we leave the snow, but it was around 180 days before it even rained! Though I love a rainy day here and there, I quickly got use to daily sunshine and an average temperature of 72. As for Georgia, as a kid visiting every year (my parents are from Georgia), I remember thinking that I’d love to live in Atlanta some day. At the time, it seemed livelier than Milwaukee. Now that I’m here … it’s okay.

The one thing that I’ve dreamed of doing but haven’t done – is own a coffee lounge. Mind you, I’m not a big coffee drinker, but I love the atmosphere of coffee shops. I haven’t totally given up on this dream (I even have a great name for it), but I think I’ll hold off on it until we move back (if/when) to the west coast. Getting our car registered in Georgia was a pain. I can only imagine what I’d have to go through to open a coffee lounge!

As for writing, it wasn’t a dream. I’ve always journaled, but I didn’t dream of a three book deal until a few years ago. We’ll see what happens (smile).

So, to answer my friend’s main question – for the most part, I feel I’ve lived my dreams. What about you – are you living your dreams?

12 Wishes

Forget setting New Year’s resolutions; let’s talk about having wishes granted!

This weekend I watched a movie, well part of the movie, where the main character was granted 12 wishes to use any way she pleased. Initially she couldn’t believe it, so her first few wishes included things like: wishing someone would send her flowers, wishing for a new pair of shoes; and I think one of her wishes was that her friend could get her hair done before she ran into her ex-boyfriend (smile). After using up the first few wishes on things of that nature and getting them granted, she then went big and wished to win the lottery. Once she’d used up all 12 wishes, she found out the wishes came at a cost (there was a catch – of course), unfortunately, it was around that time I stopped watching (ha!) so I can’t tell you how it ended. Sorry. 

At any rate, the movie did get me to thinking. I pulled out my journal and jotted down 12 of my wishes. Although some were selfless like: I wished that there were no homeless people and that everyone had a nice place to live; another wish – no hungry children. It makes no since that some of us eat until we have to release the top button on our jeans and have leftovers, while some children barely get a meal a day. Those were a couple of my huge wishes. Then there were those that were a little more selfish: I wish I had a Neatdesk Scanner. I wish I was debt free (of course I was thinking – then I could do more for the homeless and the hungry); but one of my biggest wishes, besides getting a lucrative three book deal/contract with a mainstream publisher, is that I wish Beverly Jenkins and Brenda Jackson would call me up and say that they would like for me to be in a three story anthology with them (contemporary romance or romantic suspense)! One story by each of them and then my story would be between theirs. Ahh, I can see the cover now with all three of our names. Hey, I figure, if you’re going to wish – wish big!

So if you were granted 12 wishes, what would your list look like?

Multi-tasking is a Myth, Or So I’ve Been Told

For years I’ve prided myself on being able to get a lot done in minimum time. I even took on the Army’s old recruiting slogan – “we do more things before 8 a.m. than most people do all day.” That was me, getting an early start to my day to see how much I could get done before 8 a.m. I’ve always considered myself the ultimate multi-tasker, but now I’m wondering if my version of multi-tasking has really been as productive as I’ve thought. 

I’ve often heard people say – multi-tasking is a myth. In my mind, I wondered how that was possible since I typically take care of several tasks at the same time. If having a load of clothes washing, and a pot of brown rice cooking on the stove while I work on one of my writing assignments is not multi-tasking, then what is? I decided to do some research.

According to neuroscientist, Earl Miller, humans can’t focus on more than one thing at a time, but they can “shift their focus from one thing to the next with astonishing speed.” We may think we’re paying attention to everything we have going on around us, but we’re not. He says that often times, “similar tasks compete to use the same part of the brain.” One example I liked: typing an email while talking on the telephone.  This is almost impossible to do effectively – I’ve tried it. “They both involve communicating via speech or the written word, and so there’s a lot of conflict between the two of them.”

It turns out, most of the tasks I do simultaneously are considered “background tasking” according to business coach, Dave Crenshaw. This is when you’re “doing two or more tasks, with only one of them requiring mental effort” like my example above. It’s suggested that instead of trying to do several things at once, give your complete focus to one task at a time.  That’s a nice idea…but will I be able to accomplish as much? Hmm…I’m not sure.

Surepayroll did a study and found that “despite the widespread acceptance of multi-tasking, one in four small business owners report that multi-tasking in some way hinders their working ability. Multi-tasking skeptics cited everything from decreased quality in work, tasks taking longer than in the past and becoming burned out more quickly.”

Now I’m curious. I’m thinking about trying to limit my version of multi-tasking and see how many tasks I can scratch off my daily to-do-list. I have no doubt that this will be super hard for me, especially since I’ve mirrored the Army’s old slogan regarding all I can get done before 8 a.m., for well over 20 years. I also can’t imagine it being as much fun, but we’ll see.

What are your thoughts on multi-tasking?

Live As God Intended

Just thinking about a devotional I ran across the other day. It included some wonderful reminders and I felt compelled to share them with you. Here are ten scriptural principles to help you live as God intended.

1. Guard your tongue. Always say less than you think and others will respect you.
2. Make promises sparingly, keep them faithfully and people will trust you.
3. Never let an opportunity pass to say a kind word, and someday you will look back with joy and not regret.
4. Be genuinely interested in others; show it by listening attentively and expressing your appreciation.
5. Be cheerful. Don’t dwell on your aches and pains; everybody has trouble. There are people in hospitals who’d gladly trade places with you.
6. Keep an open mind and try to get all the facts. Discuss, but don’t argue. Learn to disagree without being disagreeable. Give other people the benefit of the  doubt.
7. Discourage gossip, it’s destructive.
8. Be sensitive to the feeling of others. If you do, people will consider you to be wise.
9. Pay no attention to ill-natured remarks about you. Live so that nobody will believe them.
10. Don’t worry about getting the credit, just keep giving your best and be patient. God records and God rewards!

Source: The Word for You Today – www.rumc.com

Ghetto Burger – Lunch with Tanya and Jamal

I was just thinking about this past weekend. You know I’m not the most patient person in the world. So why did I wait over an hour for an $8 burger? I’ll tell you why, because one of my best friends, Tanya, was visiting me from Chicago and insisted we check out one of the joints from her Diners, Drive-in’s and Dives list.

Okay, so let me tell you about our dining experience. The place was super small. It seats eight people inside (that’s right eight barstools and a grill), and about that many outside on the screened in patio.  So we climb the four steps to the door, open it, and the owner tells us we can’t come in. Say what?  I would have loved to see our faces myself, because I’m sure we were looking real crazy. It wasn’t just that she basically told us to get out, but it was the way she said it. …or maybe it was the way I heard it.  So when she shooed us out, I’m thinking – cool- I’m outta here. I was ready to hop back in the car and go up the street to Checkers.  But nooo, Tanya wasn’t hearing it. She’d come too far to check out this ghetto burger that G. Garvin said was a must have. 

Okay, so we back out the door and down the stairs. Of course it’s at that point we notice this little itty bitty sign on a window on the side of the door that says you can’t come in until there’s an empty seat available.  I’m thinking, she could probably keep more customers if that sign was bigger AND posted ON the door.

And you’re probably wondering where Jamal fits into this story, huh? I sat next to him, on one of the eight bar stools, and we all had a good laugh at the fact we were all sitting there waiting for a burger, but being treated like crap. At least G. Garvin had warned that we probably wouldn’t receive any southern hospitality. Poor Jamal hadn’t received a heads up – so he was kinda sittin’ in shock – and it turns out, he’d been there forty minutes prior to our arrival and we received our food maybe two seconds before he did.

Throughout our waiting experience, we watched as the owner shooed customers out of the shack, telling them they can’t come in. I’m sitting there thinking, so that’s what we looked like when we got shooed out. Many got back into their cars and drove off, but surprisingly, many stayed.

BTW, did I happen to mention that you don’t get a choice of eating inside? Nope, since the place only seats eight, if you want to eat
there, you have to eat on the patio.

But on a serious note, since the burger was pretty good I’ll give you the name of the place – Ann’s Snack Bar.  Just keep in mind – if you go, be prepared to wait…outside.

Sharon C. Cooper

My Time with Morehouse Men

Yesterday I had the pleasure of spending some time with Morehouse men. Dr. Gwendolyn Williams, a faculty member at Morehouse, invited me to be a judge in her Reading and Critical Thinking class. The young men in her class participated in group assignments that were based on Hill Harper’s book: Letters to a Young Brother: MANifest Your Destiny.

For those of you who are not familiar with the book, Harper, through a series of letters to young brothers, addresses several topics that young men have asked him personally. The topics cover everything from school, money and careers, to girls, family life and achieving goals. The book is an inspirational read, ideal for any young man whether he has questions or not. As far as I’m concern, it should be mandatory reading for any male who is age 13 or older. Keep in mind there are some sensitive topics Harper covers in the book, but he does it expertly.

But getting back to the presentations. Out of five groups, I judged two of them. Each group took a different aspect from the book and presented on it using their personal styles. The first group’s topic was part three of Harper’s book – The Real Deal: Girls, Sex, and Responsibility. They presented using monologues/poems and had videos to drive home their point. Needless to say those  were some pretty…dicey topics, but I thought they handled them beautifully.  The second group I observed did a skit for their  presentation. Their group’s topic was from part two of Harper’s book – School, Work, and Money: Mining Our Resources.  Through a series of scenes, the skit followed a young man as he confronted various issues in his young life where he had to make tough decisions with the assistance of an angel consulting in one ear, and the devil chattering in his other.

Personally, I was impressed by both groups! It was encouraging to see young men who were not only able to articulate their words and thoughts superbly, but who also exhibited passion on the topics they spoke on. My hat goes off to Dr. Williams for giving these young men a platform to show their intellectual, acting, and creative abilities. I felt honored to be invited!

Let me know if you’ve ever read Harper’s book.  And if so, what did you think?

Tips for Starting a Home-Based Business

With the economy the way it is today, many people are looking to start their own home-based business. According to the Small Business Association (SBA), home-based businesses make up approximately fifty-percent of all U.S. businesses. Whether part-time or as your full-time gig, working from home and being your own boss might be just what you’re looking for right now.

If you’re considering starting a home-based business, here are a few things to think about before you quit your day job.

What’s a home-based business?

A home-based business is a business that provides help to others, while you manage the business from your home office. This can be anything from dog walking, freelance writing, to managing business accounts. The basis of a successful business is one that supplies a need. It may take some research, but you can discover the top service needs in your area or city, and then figure out which one of those services you can provide.

Operating a home-based business

There are several benefits to operating a home-based business. The most obvious benefit – you can work from home. Since you already pay a mortgage/rent, and utilities, the only thing you need to spend money on now is the equipment for your business. And, in many cases, you probably already own most of the needed equipment.

Secondly, a home-based business requires low overhead and start-up costs. Overhead costs typically include (but are not limited to) advertising, insurance, interest, legal fees, rent, repairs, supplies, taxes, telephone bills, travel and utilities. These costs are normally low for home-based businesses. In most cases, your start-up cost will include a computer, additional software, office supplies/equipment, and a telephone.

Establishing a website for selling your services lowers the overhead even more and maximizes your profit (saves on advertisement
costs).

Home-based business options

Virtual assistance has taken off in a big way in the last ten years. Using a computer, fax machine, telephone, and internet access, you can perform various administrative duties for small and large companies. You are paid for the work you do, so there is no extra charge for the company (like employee taxes, benefits…or call-ins!). Virtual assisting skills run from transcription to accounting to managing email and company websites.

Ghostwriting is the process of writing articles, novels, eBooks and more for an individual or a company. Using your writing talent, you can make good money creating literary works (print and electronic) for others who need them. Though the person hiring your services will have total ownership of the work you create, you still make money doing what you enjoy.

Offering Cleaning Services to companies or individuals will definitely fill a need. If you want to work second or third shift, you can focus on office clients. Take it a step further and identify retail businesses that are within a few blocks from each other (saves time and money). Perhaps house cleaning is more your speed. In this case, you probably won’t have to spend a lot of money on advertising or marketing because your customers will come by word of mouth.

Getting started tips

There are things to consider before starting any type of business, even a home-based one.

1. Research the local laws for registering and zoning a home business. Most home businesses require no zoning issues unless
   you’ll be meeting numerous clients in your home, posting signs in the yard, or causing external nuisance s (e.g., noise, odors, etc).
2. Small business tax laws. Now that you are a business, you are subject to different tax exemptions, deductions and payments. Sites like www.irs.gov can give you the information you need.
3. Create a separate work space at home. This could be as simple as using a spare bedroom or a corner in the dining room. The
   main focus should be on finding a space to keep your work separate from your personal household items. A separate telephone line (or a pay as you go phone) is always a good idea. When you need to meet with clients – coffee shops, books
   stores and even the library make great meeting places. Or, you can rent virtual office space for a nominal monthly fee (you’ll be able to use their address for marketing material, and have access to their business machines, and conference rooms).
4. Use on and off-line marketing methods to find clients. Such as: public databases, newspaper and Yellow Pages ads, direct
   mailings, email marketing, and designing your own website.
5. Practicing good time management will play a major role in whether or not you’re successful. Create a schedule to divide
   time between work and family. Balancing both is hard, but not impossible.

A home-based business is an alternative for people who want to be their own boss without spending a lot in start-up costs. If you have a talent/gift and you can see or fulfill a need, consider a home-based business.

10 Ways to use a Virtual Assistant

Most people, who know me, know that I’m a Virtual Assistant (VA). But the comment I hear often is, “I don’t know how to use a virtual assistant.”  With companies downsizing, and people going out on their own to start businesses, they are looking at how they can do business differently.  In searching for a more cost effective way to get things done, without having to do everything themselves –they hire VAs.

A virtual assistant can handle most anything an onsite executive assistant can do – but instead, we do everything remotely. Listed below are just 10 of many ways you can use a VA.

 Administrative Support / Secretary

Number 1

Your VA can plan and schedule one on one meetings, as well as arrange conference calls.

Number 2

If you or your staff travel on a regular basis, your VA can coordinate your air travel, car rental and hotel reservations (and even ID the best restaurants to check out).

Number 3

Assistance with day-to-day items – Your VA can keep your website up-to-date, organize and maintain paper (even virtually), as well as maintain electronic files. Not a good writer? Get your VA to assist you with correspondences, website content, blogs, and even powerpoint presentations.

Bookkeeping

Number 4

A VA can assist you with keeping track of your accounts payable and receivables. Once bills are paid, your VA can enter or download transactions into whatever accounting software you’re using; reconcile bank statements; enter credit card transactions;  prepare invoices; enter deposits; and prepare end of the month reports.

Are you wondering how your VA can reconcile your account? One way is by you mailing, scanning or e-mailing your VA a copy of your check register and bank statement; VA enters data into accounting software and reconciles your account.

Number 5

Trouble remembering to pay your bills? No problem. Your VA can create a spreadsheet with all of your bills and due dates, then remind you either by e-mail or telephone as due dates approach.

Research

Number 6

You’re looking to expand your business or start a new business in another state. Your VA can do the leg work for you as far as identifying your competition, state regulations, as well as find ideal locations.

Number 7

You sell seminars/workshops and maybe even books that you’ve written. Your VA can research a target industry; prepare a list of companies; call to identify a contact person, and even prepare introductory material to send out. Your VA can also do follow up calls to verify the information has been received and maybe even schedule a sales call.

Project Management

Number 8

You use consultants, employees, or team members, but you end up spending all of your time making sure they stay on task. Your VA can keep things running smoothly by staying in touch with everyone, using online calendars and scheduling tools, e-mails, or picking up the phone and calling to make sure everyone is meeting their deadlines. Then your VA reports back to you by e-mail or any other method that has been created.

Event Management

Number 9

You need a venue for your next conference, seminar or event. Your VA can research venues -including availability, size, and specifics. Your VA obtains written quotes, compiles a comparison chart, and report findings to you.

Number 10

Your VA can keep in touch with speakers and send out announcements about the event specifics and their role. Your VA can also keep track of who has and hasn’t RSVP’d, as well as send out reminders.

Let me know if you’ve ever used a virtual assistant. And if you haven’t…why not?

Get it Done! Part 2

A special thanks to all of you who shared some of your time management tips, and struggles.  Below are a couple of additional ways to “Get it Done!”

1. Add time frames to your To-Do-List: A few weeks ago I did a test to see if I could get more accomplished if I put
   time frames next to each item on my list. For example, my schedule might say workout 7- 8am, Breakfast 8:30 – 8:50, then first project 9 -10:30, next to social media I might put 10:30am – 10:45am and the list goes on. This method helps me stay on task better, and it lets me know if I’m falling behind schedule. It also assists in limiting the number of things I put on my to-do-list (so as to not over book).
2. Identify your time wasters: Have you ever had one of those days where you had massive things to do, but didn’t get half the things done? It’s probably because you allowed several time wasters to creep into your day. Some famous time wasters are the telephone, emailing and texting, people who drop by your house/office without calling, and the biggest one these days is social media. As a virtual assistant, I understand the importance of staying connected virtually – which might mean
   checking emails or seeing what’s going on on Facebook. You can still stay on top of those things, just add them to your schedule…treat them like an appointment, which leads me to my next item.
3. Procrastination is not your friend: Normally, I’m not a procrastinator, but this past week I found myself doing the one thing I often talk to my clients about not doing and that’s procrastinating. I had a self-appointed project (some marketing of my VA business) and it wasn’t something I was looking forward to doing, but something that needed to be done. Believe me when I say, I found everything to do – but that! I replaced carpet on a set of stairs in our townhouse, and painted the entry hallway (on top of some of my normal weekly responsibilities). Anything to keep from doing what I was scheduled to do. I kept moving that particular project to the next day. Then after about three days of rescheduling, I called my friend Carmen (of Ray’s Consulting). I had every intention of begging her to do the part of the marketing that I couldn’t seem to make myself do, but being the brilliant person that she is, she gave me a pep talk (or more like a kick in the butt) that had me feeling like I could take on the world once we had finished our conversation!  Needless to say, the rest of the week was crazy productive! So I say all of that to say, don’t let procrastination get the best of you – call a friend or an
   accountability partner to get you back on track.
4. Accountability Partners: I have some amazing mentors/friends in my life. No I don’t talk to them every day, or every week for that matter, but I love the fact that I can call on any of them at anytime. If you don’t have accountability partners/mentors/ or good friends who you can call on for encouragement or support – find some!

Though I could go on and on about how to “Get it Done,” I think I’ll stop here and let you tell me about your time wasters, procrastination, and your accountability partners.

Get it done! Part 1

There are 24 hours in a day. How do you use yours? Martha Stewart is known for many things, one being - she’s a good time manager. When asked during an interview how she managed to accomplish so much in a day’s time, her response was that there are 24 hours in a day – and she uses them. If you think about it, 24 hours is a long time. Imagine what you could accomplish if you took the time to plan out your day.

As a virtual assistant, part of my success is dependent upon my time management and organizational skills. At any given time I might have four or five projects for clients going on at the same time, and there are times when the deadlines fall on the same day.  So having a schedule is a priority. Listed below are just a couple of things I do to stay on task and get things done.

1. Master To-Do-List: One of American Express’s slogans is – Never Leave Home Without It. Well, I have a slogan– Never Start Your Day without a To-Do-List. Most of us have so many responsibilities until we can easily get overwhelmed. Not only should you have a daily list of things to do, but have a master To-Do-List. The master To-Do-List  is where you add every single thing you want or need to get done (at some point). Everything from getting the hallway painted, to downloading telephone numbers from your cell phone to the computer. Since the master To-Do-List is usually ridiculously long, you then break it down over numerous days (or months for some) – this is the start of your daily To-Do-List.
2. Daily To-Do-List: Keep your daily To-Do-List doable. Don’t go putting 10 things on the list if you know that each item is going to take 4 hours.  When done that way, you automatically set yourself up for failure. For large projects (things that will take several hours or days) try to work on them over a couple of days (that means planning ahead), because at the end of the day, you want to feel like you’ve accomplished at least a couple of things on your list. I usually include 2 or 3 things I know I have to get done, then one or two things I want to get done (1 or 2 fun things –like clean the bathrooms or finish the painting that goes over the fireplace). I also start my list w/ something that might only take 30-60 minutes before I dive into those items that will be more than an hour. And just for fun, when I complete something on my list, I scratch the item off the list. It’s a wonderful feeling to know that you’ve accomplished something.

Stay tuned for Part II of – Getting It Done.  In the meantime- what are some of the things you do to stay on task – and get things done?